Wednesday, May 10, 2006

Summer Loving: The First Date

...from the man's side of the table

Keep it at the door. When I coach women on what men are thinking (yes, we do have brilliant thoughts from time to time!) I try to tell them exactly what is going through our minds, no matter how old-fashioned it may sound. I have found that so many successful relationships started out the same way our parents relationships did. Let me explain. Most of our mothers would never have dreamed of making it too easy for the guy or trying to take control of the evening. There is nothing worse than a first date where you never leave the apartment. So, make sure he comes to PICK YOU UP PROPERLY, unless you have to meet him somewhere due to time contraints. Also, make sure there is no tour, no photo albums pulled out and no quick cocktail in your bachelorette pad. Coming upstairs should be a privilege, not something that is assumed. Bottom line: let him get to know your doorman the first time around.

Keep it light. Don't get into heavy conversations. If you give it all away too fast, there is really no reason for us to ask you out a second time. Please, please, please don't reveal any future expectations you may have of us at this time. We simply want to enjoy a beautiful, confident woman who has chosen to spend an evening with us over anyone else who may have asked. Also, don't get drunk. Keep it to a two drink maximum. We don't want to know you can drink us under the table (hopefully you can't!). A man who is really looking for a relationship, is really looking for a lady.

Keep it from getting physical. Don't let it get to the couch, the bedroom or the floor! Yes, we want to sleep with you, what man wouldn't!? But, that is our makeup. Initially, the IDEA of sleeping with you is much more powerful than the reality of it, until it's time. Sex in no way ensure you a second date...if fact, it may only ensure you will never see us again.